No Touch Monkey!

And Other Travel Lessons Learned Too Late

A self-admittedly bumbling tourist, Halliday shares—with razor-sharp wit and to hilarious effect—the travel stories most are too self-conscious to tell.

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Buy this book
$17.00 USD
September 2015
272 pages
5.5" x 8.25"
Second Edition
Trade Paper

Print Edition

ISBN: 9781580056014

No Touch Monkey!

And Other Travel Lessons Learned Too Late

By Ayun Halliday

$17.00 USD, Trade Paper, September 2015

Ayun Halliday may not make for the most sensible travel companion, but she is certainly one of the most outrageous, with a knack for inserting herself (and her unwitting cohorts) into bizarre situations around the globe. Curator of kitsch and unabashed aficionada of pop culture, Halliday offers bemused, self-deprecating narration of events from guerilla theater in Romania to drug-induced Apocalypse Now reenactments in Vietnam to a perhaps even more surreal collagen-implant demonstration at a Paris fashion show emceed by Lauren Bacall. On layover in Amsterdam, Halliday finds unlikely trouble in the red-light district—eliciting the ire of a tiny, violent madam, and is forced to explain tampons to luggage-searching soldiers in Kashmir: “They’re for ladies. Bleeding ladies.” A self-admittedly bumbling tourist, Halliday shares—with razor-sharp wit and to hilarious effect—the travel stories most are too self-conscious to tell.

This second edition includes a new foreword from the author.

About Ayun Halliday

Ayun Halliday, author of No Touch MonkeyAyun Halliday is the Chief Primatologist of the long running, award-winning East Village Inky zine and author of the self-mocking autobiographies No Touch Monkey! And Other Travel Lessons Learned Too Late, The Big Rumpus, Dirty Sugar Cookies: Culinary Observations, Questionable Taste, and Job Hopper. She collaborated with illustrator Dan Santat on the picture book Always Lots of Heinies at the Zoo, and with Paul Hoppe on Peanut, a graphic novel for young adults. Luddite vagabonds may remember her as the author of the analog guidebook The Zinester’s Guide to NYC. She is a regular contributor to Open Culture, and freelances both articles and illustrations to a variety of other publications.

Ayun graduated from the Chicago School of Massage Therapy in an attempt to shore up her highly impractical Bachelor’s degree in theater from Northwestern University. As a member of the Neo-Futurists, Ayun wrote and performed in more than 500 short plays. Lately, she has been creating theater with homeschooled teens, notably The Mermaid’s Legs, an experimental adaptation of the Hans Christian Andersen story, and Anne Bonny Improv for Teenaged Girls. Her dream is to play the Nurse in Romeo and Juliet.

She lives in Brooklyn with the playwright Greg Kotis, and their children, India and Milo. Read more from Ayun at AyunHalliday.com.

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